It has become necessary to consider both a reduction in support due to a change in circumstances (I have been laid off) and the termination of support for my older daughter as she is turning 18 in the near future. She plans on continuing her education, but not for some time. Her mother insists that she deserves continued support and while I am fine with this if she provides documentation, if she cannot I will need to proceed. After the level of support, and frankly over-payment both by the courts order and my own distrust of the system*, I need to re-open these wounds. I have no choice. This is not a process anyone enjoys, least of all me. My ex-wife clearly believes my choice is one of greed or selfishness, but those people that know me can vouch that this has never been, and will never be, my motivation. Any parent, no matter what the situation, will always ask themselves "am I doing this for the kids" and only if that answer is "yes" should they proceed. I can proceed.
I'll keep you all posted on the process and progress.
* because I had such little faith in the system the last time I was out of work (7 months) I did not pursue a reduction in support, instead I paid the full amount through this time. I also was saddled with an imputed income charge in 2002 that amounted to $15,000 be set as arrears and to be paid over three years. My income was imputed to $35,000 when my actual and true income, was ~$9,000. It was not a matter of being under-employed by choice, but because I'm in tech and that was a time when the .com bubble burst. I endured and survived by driving a tow-truck, roadside assistance, but rather than allow me to build up this role, the system (at my ex-wife's request) took my license and my ability to pay any bills. I had to walk away from and earned zero dollars for months while things were sorted out. I estimate I have over-paid support by ~$18,000. I have been fortunate that my parents were in a position to help.
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