It's surprisingly recent that I posted about this sort of thing, but I guess my ex-wife doesn't read my blog. I can't say I blame her, it might piss her off to see I use lessons I've learned from our experience as education towards others.
DO NOT TRY TO INFLUENCE OR MANIPULATE YOUR CHILDREN TO DISLIKE THE OTHER PARENT!
DO NOT TRY TO INFLUENCE OR MANIPULATE YOUR CHILDREN TO DISLIKE THE OTHER PARENT!
DO NOT TRY TO INFLUENCE OR MANIPULATE YOUR CHILDREN TO DISLIKE THE OTHER PARENT!
Do you understand?
I was recently told by my daughter that my ex-wife showed her some "evidence" of the breakdown of our relationship. It was a photo/graphic that I had created for a friend that expressed love for them. Love has many forms, a friendship can have a significant amount of love and expressing it, telling the friend is not a bad thing. I did just that and my ex-wife went as far as to invade my privacy by snooping my e-mail and computer to discover this image. That I have forgiven her for, and while she may never understand the context of the message (image) the idea that she showed this to her. My daughter's belief is that my ex-wife was trying to influence her opinion of me, discredit me. She is likely true and I am proud of my daughter for reacting with contempt for the effort.
Why? The marriage ended "officially" in January 1999. The "evidence" has been kept for nearly 10 years as a manner of tearing open the wound as she sees fit. I will not re-iterate the real reason I walked away, but the reality she will never accept is that it was never for another woman. It was for my own self-respect.
2 comments:
Do you have any information on parental alienation. My husband has a court order that is being broken weekly, and has not seen his six year old son for two months now with no hope of seeing him anytime soon. when he calls to talk to him, his son doesn't want to talk. This boys parents never lived together and right from the start he was coached into not bonding with his father because 'he doesn't take care of me' (quoted from when the boy was 2). We don't know where to go and my husband is ready to walk away. (support has been and will be always paid in full and up to date, although we have two children of our own and are currently bankrupt from the now useless, court order) any help would be great. we are both at a loss. I will keep my eyes open for your response, i fear any negative retribution for using my real name. This is our legal system in action.
I don't have much information myself but...
http://www.parentalalienation.org/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parental_alienation
http://www.dont-forget-about-daddy.co.uk/
Alec Baldwin's case and a book (which I have yet to find) may be of help too.
It certainly does seem wrong to be demanded to pay support when you're being forced from the child's life. It's worse when you want to be a part of the child's life and the PA effect is not allowing it.
I'll see what else I can find out.
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